Tag Archives: Review

The Human Centipede Vs Slumber Party Massacre

Right so there’s this centipede. He’s called Arthur Pod. He hates his life, his job as a grape treader and the little room he rents from his Aunt Enna. Then one day a giant creature wielding a metal spade turns … Continue reading

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My Name is Region, For We Are Many.

I live somewhere. Outside this very house is somewhere. No, honest, I can see it out my window. Somewhere. An actual place. So why doesn’t comedy? Remember that Executive Comedy Editor for Commissioning Editor Executives? Well, at a comedy briefing … Continue reading

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Zoltan, Hound of Dracula Vs Zombieland

Well hello there, dog flashback. That’s a dog remembering how it became a vampire. Just think about that for a second. The chance to watch the visual memories of a dead dog as its unliving brain replays its own death … Continue reading

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Ratman Vs Tokyo Gore Police

Italian Horror, you’ve got to love it. Oh look there’s a fat Italian actor who looks like he’s been stung repeatedly in the face by wasps. That’ll be the wasps hanging around the pakora plate at the lunch wagon. Fuckin … Continue reading

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Dread Vs Daybreakers

Hey you guys, where’s the joy? At any time during the writing or preparing or shooting or editing did you rub your hands in idiotic glee? Did you ever giggle like a 5-year-old hiding a dog shit in their parents’ … Continue reading

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Survival of the Dead Vs Cabin Fever 2

George, George, George. Survival Of The Dead? Comedy? Really? So many have taken your zombie ball and run with it that you’re reduced to clunky, tortured, cheapo comedy? That special gift you made especially for me is now a prop … Continue reading

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The Children Rant

Hey The Children, c’mere a minute. Here’s the thing…The Children under ten years old aren’t scary. Unless you do something fucking smart, or fun, with them, I’m not going to be scared by an evil that can be shooed away … Continue reading

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